Christine Schlonski [0:02]
Hey Gorgeous. This is episode number 222.

Steve Olsher [0:06]
Hi, it’s Steve Olsher here. You are listening to the Heart Sells! Podcast with Christine Schlonski. Enjoy.

Christine Schlonski [0:13]
I’m pumped to have Steve Olsher on the show, finally. You don’t even know how long it took me to get him on for you. I’m really looking forward to our conversation today. We are going to talk about confidence and why Steve thinks that this is an ongoing battle. Steve Olsher is known as the world’s foremost reinvention expert. He is a 30 plus year entrepreneur, the founder and editor in chief of Podcasts Magazine, the creator of the new media summit, host of the number one rated podcast, Reinvention Radio and Beyond Eight Figures. An international keynote speaker and in-demand media guest. Well, I can’t wait for us to dive in and to get Steve’s knowledge and advice from this episode. Have so much fun. Enjoy. Well, I’m so super excited to have you on Heart Sells! Podcast today, Steve. Welcome.

Steve Olsher [1:13]
Cheers, and thank you for having me.

Christine Schlonski [1:15]
Yes, I’m really looking forward to this interview because you have achieved such amazing success as an entrepreneur. Being a podcaster yourself super, super successful. Now, just launching a magazine, a podcast magazine, which is super, super exciting, and we’re gonna talk about this as well. Have you always been confident? Have you always been in the place where you kind of knew you’re just gonna go out there and make stuff happen?

Steve Olsher [1:50]
That’s an interesting question. Confidence is an ongoing battle. I’m not sure that confidence is ever the right word. I don’t think I ever go into any entrepreneurial endeavor with confidence or certainty. Maybe I should. But no, I don’t think confidence is ever part of my thinking. I think it’s always, it’s more about not wanting to live with regret. If I don’t try it, is that going to be worse than if I do it and it fails? Failure, of course, is a relative term anyway. But no, I mean, it’s just such an interesting question because we ran out of the gates just get me thinking. No, I don’t think, like podcasts magazine. You mentioned that, right out of the gate. No, I don’t have any confidence at all. It’s going to change the world or be scooped up for 100 million dollars at some point or whatever it might be. I would of course, love for that to happen. I think there’s a good likelihood of that happening. But, yeah, you just never really know until you put something forth, and then the market will decide for you whether or not you should have confidence in that idea.

Christine Schlonski [3:28]
Yeah. Well, you know, so many entrepreneurs procrastinate or can’t really ask for what they truly desire and have this little voice in their head that tells someone, “Maybe I’m not good enough. Maybe I don’t have the right education. Maybe I’m too old, too young”, like all of this going on. Looking at someone who has reached a certain success level, can be kind of intimidating and I just want to see, I just want to love for people to see that. We are all humans. I’m not waking up every day thinking I’m going to conquer the world. And today’s just going to be perfect. Like, sometimes we just wake up and we think, “Well, I don’t even know if this is working or not. I’m just going to give it a try.” And as you said, like not having regrets is a big motivator. What else can people do to keep moving to really go for their dreams?

Steve Olsher [4:25]
You know, it’s, it really just begins largely with having clarity around what those dreams actually are. And because I think that most folks who just kind of go through, go through life end up with just a lack of clarity around. What really is most important to them. The truth of the matter is that not everybody needs to have a big dream. Not everybody needs to have this big, audacious goal and there’s nothing wrong with people just doing what they do and coming home and watching Hulu or Netflix or you know, cable or just reading a book or drawing or doing whatever they love to do, and waking up and doing it again the next day. I think we’ve put a lot of pressure on people to try to live to a certain degree of expectation, if you will, that others have put forth and said, this is what defines a good life. This is what defines when someone is happy. I think that we have seen. I know that we have seen time and time and time again, that those who acquire certain levels of material, wealth. Certainly, those who are able to build big companies as an example. Even those who win the lottery. The fact of the matter is that money buys you freedom, it doesn’t buy you happiness, and those who don’t really desire freedom aren’t going to be motivated by additional money. Because it’s the structure of going and doing something that whether or not they love it, it’s just the structure of going to do it, that fuels them and drives them. And so ultimately, I think we’re doing a bit of a disservice to folks to saying that is, saying you have to achieve your dreams because a lot of people just don’t have a dream that’s any different than what they have right now. Why shouldn’t that be okay?

Christine Schlonski [6:58]
Yeah, it totally is okay. It’s just for those entrepreneurs who look up to people and see their success. They see them out there and social media.

Steve Olsher [7:10]
What is it that they’re seeing them? That’s what the real question is. What is it that they’re seeing that they desire? Is it having 1000 employees behind you in a picture? Is it having a big office building? Is it having the zeros in the bank? Is it having a car? If people can become really clear on what it is. Like when they see that, what really is the trigger? What really is the desire? What is the emotion tied to that desire? In almost every circumstance, with rare exceptions, the feeling that sits behind that is approval.

Christine Schlonski [8:04]
Also, people compare themselves, they just say, “Well, I’m not there in my business yet. I don’t have these employees. I don’t have the picture of the car or whatever.” I think by sharing the success stories just to inspire people to understand that everybody has walked down a certain path to get to whatever they have, whoever they became, it’s like getting up each and every day doing something that brings them closer to the bigger vision they have for their own life.

Steve Olsher [8:41]
Yeah, and again, just the assumption is that bigger vision exists, or that bigger vision is even necessary.

Christine Schlonski [8:50]
Oh,

Steve Olsher [8:52]
Again, that’s what I’m asking you to consider is that what if it’s not even necessary?

Christine Schlonski [9:00]
Yeah, and I agree it’s not necessary. At the end of the day, we all want to be happy. It’s not about the zeros on the bank, it’s about how you feel.

Steve Olsher [9:14]
The zeros in the bank do allow you too, to attain a certain feeling. The two are connected, they’re not —

Christine Schlonski [9:24]
It’s more choices.

Steve Olsher [9:27]
It’s choices and, you know, it’s about really having clarity around the feelings that are tied to the zeros, because again, who am I to say that your self worth has to be defined in the same way that I define mine? That in of itself is, I think one of the hardest things for any individual person to do is to create their own definition. And that’s hard to do.

Christine Schlonski [10:09]
Yeah. Would you agree that it’s important when you go onto this entrepreneurial journey that you get really clear about what kind of life you would love to live, to then figure out what your entrepreneurial, entrepreneurial journey should look like? So that it accommodates the lifestyle or the desire, instead of you know, creating yourself may be another kind of job where you feel stuck.

Steve Olsher [10:43]
It’s so much easier said than done.

Christine Schlonski [10:46]
Yes, totally.

Steve Olsher [10:49]
But I do think there is something, it just in the way that we are wired as human beings, there is something to having clarity around whatever that finish line is. Even if you move that line, we are, I think we’re naturally wired to excel when we have a specific goal and a specific finish line. I think that that is absolutely something that will just go I mean, it speaks volumes about those who are able to accomplish a certain degree of success in their lives in time and time again, if you look at those who have, you know, who have achieved what we might look at and go, “Yeah, that’s, that’s the definition of success.” It’s because they laid out a very specific finish line for themselves, and have worked until they got there. That, of course, really that goes, it’s universal. I mean, that could be in terms of the relationship that you have, in terms of the body that you have, in terms of the life satisfaction that you have, and then it goes across the board for sure.

Christine Schlonski [12:11]
I think the most important piece of it is that you come up with your own definition. It’s not what your parents want or what your neighbor does. It’s like, what makes you happy? What gets you excited? And what you know, kind of makes life fun and juicy to explore.

Steve Olsher [12:31]
Sure. Yeah, absolutely. Absolutely.

Christine Schlonski [12:35]
So when you look back, what was the very first thing you’ve ever sold in your life?

Steve Olsher [12:44]
Um, you know, I’ve been, I have been a salesman, so to speak for most of my life. I mean, I think that we, I think that we are always selling. I mean, even from the time that we’re babies, we’re selling our parents on feeding us, on changing us and so on and so forth. I don’t think there’s any doubt at all that we’re, we’re salespeople at our core, even, you know, even when we go way, way, way, way, way back to being an influence. But in terms of like literal sales, I was always wired as an entrepreneur of sorts. From the time that I was old enough to pick up a rake and go door to door and offer to rake leaves or grab a snow shovel and offer to shovel sidewalks and driveways or when I was old enough to be able to afford a lawnmower, to be able to go door to door again, and offer to mow lawns and, you know and so on. So, I mean, that started when I was very, very young. I mean, certainly in my early teens, you know, probably 13 years old, maybe even a bit younger.

Christine Schlonski [14:15]
Wow. And do you remember the very first time when you actually exchange your services for money how that felt?

Steve Olsher [14:26]
I think that the first time that I got paid for my services, probably what, I think it started in the winter so I think the first thing would have been shoveling sidewalks and driveways. Actually, I was, I was younger. Wow. Because there was a, so I grew up in Chicago, and the blizzard of 79 was one of our biggies. I think we had like 122 inches of snow that year or something saying I was 60 inches, 100 whatever it was, a big number. Not at one time of course but over the entire winter. And I was born in ’69 so I must have been 10 years old then. I was 10, yeah, and going door to door with the shovel, offering to shovel sidewalks and driveways.Not getting paid a lot of money for it either.

Christine Schlonski [15:34]
Yeah, but, you know, how did it feel like when the first person, I mean, you had to ask right? You have to ask before the sale. Obviously, the environment was supportive. People probably were happy that you came with your offer. But then you know as asking for money, did you have a price or did you just waited for what they paid? How did you negotiate? I mean, you started so young, and I guess there’s really this entrepreneurial gene in you.

Steve Olsher [16:09]
Yeah. For sure. Yes. Yeah. I mean, I’m sure I was thrilled. I mean, it was probably, I don’t remember clearly. But it was probably me and a friend, going around, just door to door offering to help. It was, just the idea. I have a vague recollection of he and I, sitting around afterward, just kind of counting all that money. I don’t know, we probably made 40 bucks each or something for that day. And yeah, and at the time, you know, that was, that was real money. So, yeah, it was. It was fun. Yeah, it was great. I mean, just, uh, you know, anytime somebody says yes, it’s just we were wired on victories, we’re wired on just that the serotonin, the neurotransmitters, the serotonin, and the oxytocin, all that stuff that just fires off when you hear something positive.That’s what we thrive on as entrepreneurs and certainly as people. I mean, that’s the same thing as just being in a relationship right and hearing yes, and making someone happy and seeing them smile and the same thing.

Christine Schlonski [17:37]
Yeah. So as an entrepreneur, usually you do not get yeses all day long. What kind of advice could you give people how to deal with the nose?

Steve Olsher [17:52]
There’s a lot of folks who teach on this and probably have better insight than I do. One book, In particular, comes to mind, which is a book called, Go for No.

Christine Schlonski [18:04]
Andrea Waltz

Steve Olsher [18:06]
Yeah. Which is an interesting approach? I know Andrea has her own thinking around that for me. I mean, I would just simply chalk it up to it being a numbers game. From the standpoint of, if you know that 20% of people typically say yes to what you put out, then it’s just simply a matter of talking to the 10 people and getting the eight nose out of the way as quickly as you can. It can either defeat you or confuse you. And there’s really no in-between. There are days where it will defeat you. It can be the exact same person and on one day that no hits you in a way where it’s like, “Okay, whatever, onward let’s go to the next one.” On another day that no one can just literally set you back and put you in your chair and just, you just feel like, “Why am I doing what I’m doing?” You can begin questioning everything. And so it’s just, it’s perfectly natural, perfectly natural.

Christine Schlonski [19:26]
So how do you deal with such a situation when it happens? Or does it still happen to you that some no kind of gets you more and you kind of have to sit back and think about it, and process it. And if you do, like what, what do you do? Do you have like a little ritual you could share or like the self-talk that really helps you to get up again and keep trying for the next yes?

Steve Olsher [19:56]
Yeah, I mean to me, it as crude as perhaps this, this may sound. To me, it’s really all about data. And so the more data, the more Intel you can gather, during that process of hearing no, the easier it becomes for you to hear yes moving forward. So, to me that the process really is allowing people to say no, and respect their decision to say no. If they’re willing, gaining an understanding of why they said no, and, and allowing them to express why they said no, and, and sometimes, you know, it could just be as simple as well, I, you know, I just can’t afford it. You know, I love the idea and I thought I came up, you know, like, I got a strategy call, right, like if you were, if you were an expert in a particular arena, and you offer a strategy calls to help someone and as part of that strategy session, you know, where you do help them and then you turn around. And in the end, you say, Well, you know, glad this was helpful for you, you know, not in these words, but you know, would you like more of this? And if the answer is no, I got what I needed. You know, okay, right. But more often than not, there’s another step that someone can take with you and your company, it’s just simply a matter of identifying what that step is. So it’s not always a no to you or to your company, it may just be a no to that particular offer. And, and that’s where the data really comes into play is just getting, you know, an understanding of what are they really saying no to? And that always is very, very helpful.

Christine Schlonski [21:47]
Yeah. And I think it’s crucial for you to understand to move forward, that you collect the data, that you dare to ask why it was a no so you can learn from it. And yeah, And then one thing obviously not taking it personal because it’s not about you. Yeah, it’s a person. It’s just what you had to offer. And I see lots of people having really difficulties with it because they do take it personally and they see it as a rejection for themselves. And that makes it even harder.

Steve Olsher [22:19]
Yeah, yeah, for sure.

Christine Schlonski [22:21]
Yeah. Awesome. Well, for this episode, I would just love to point people to your amazing podcast magazine, which they can find at http://podcastmagazine.com. Can you tell us a little bit what to expect when we go to have a look?

Steve Olsher [22:39]
Yeah. Thanks for the opportunity to share that. We started Podcast Magazine in late January 2020. We’re just thrilled to launch a magazine that’s really for podcast fans. And so the magazine takes readers beyond the microphone and into the lives of the podcasters that they love and the shows they can’t get enough of. But more importantly, it’s really, it’s really about helping shows that don’t have a chance to land on a typical podcast fans radar and give a window of insight into so many shows that are awesome. But folks just don’t have a chance to hear them because they don’t know they exist. So not only do we cover the big shows that you have heard of, but hundreds of shows and yet every issue that you probably haven’t heard of, but should be listening to So, yeah, if you think about, like Sports Illustrated or those types of magazines. I mean, it’s kind of the same thing and except this is all about podcasts and podcasts culture and the lifestyle of podcasting.

Christine Schlonski [23:59]
I love it. So I’m gonna put it this for sure in the show notes, so people can check it out and subscribe. Yeah, learn more about this fascinating podcast world, and all the things they might miss out because they haven’t discovered that yet. Thank you so, so much for your time. I’m really looking forward to our second episode, I have a ton of more questions. So I’m really excited to have the opportunity to talk to you more.

Steve Olsher [24:26]
Sounds good.

I hope you really liked that episode. And I found it so interesting that for Steve, even with that much experience, with such amazing successes he celebrated and because everything he has brought into the world, that confidence still is like an up and down journey. And I hope it also inspires you to see that you sometimes have to try things. You have to see if it works or if it doesn’t work if you can tweak it or if you have to let it go. I just loved what Steve’s share today and I hope you love those two. So hop on over to https://christineschlonski.com/ for the show notes. You will find the transcripts, all the links to Steve are right there, it’s just one click away, as well as a link to the resources we shared. And yeah, all you need to do to get your hands on everything is to hop on over to https://christineschlonski.com/podcast or https://christineschlonski.com/ and find the podcast tab and you have everything you need right there. And once you’re over there, make sure you sign up for the empowerment notes. This will give you an update on the podcast. I will share amazing content with you, special offers, special invitations to training or webinars, or special online events, as well as the content I usually do not share on social media. So hop on over to https://christineschlonski.com/ have Fun. And yeah, can’t wait for you to tune into the next episode. We will be having Steve back for Episode 223. And we’re going to talk about choose who you want to be today. And I can tell you, you will really have fun with this episode. Have a wonderful day wherever you are in this beautiful world and I’m saying bye for now.