Resources in this Episode

Christine Schlonski [0:02]
Hi, Gorgeous. Welcome to episode number 118. We have the wonderful fashion stylist Elysha Lenkin back on the show.

Elysha Lenkin [0:10]
Hi, this is Elysha Lenkin, you are listening to Heart Sells! Podcast with Christine Schlonski. Enjoy.

Christine Schlonski [0:17]
I’m so super excited to continue the conversation with Elyshaa, I had so much fun with our first conversation already. Today, we’re going to talk about how you can align your clothes, so that you truly feel authentic if you are authentic when you show up, because it will make a difference not only in your life but also in your business. People will see you. They will feel you. They will get on or catch on to your vibe. This is really, really super important. Today, I want to make a shout out to another city of fashion, which is actually Berlin, Germany. So thank you to our listeners tuning in from Germany as well from Milan, Italy. If you have not already, I actually checked my wardrobe, I went through my closet and I allow some things to go so that I have some space to add new. I’m super excited because, in a couple of weeks, I am going to be actually, not even a couple of weeks, I’m going to be in New York, and I’m going to meet up in person with Elysha so that she can take me shopping. You want to check out Elysha’s social media links that you can see what we might be up to together. As well as following her wonderful journey. Hop on over to https://christineschlonski.com/. Find the podcast tab. Check out her episode, to connect with her with the social media handles, and her amazing gifts, all on one page and one click away for you. Elysha, helps women to express themselves through fashion so they look current, feel current and stay true to themselves. As a commercial stylist for more than 20 years, she styled women of all shapes and sizes, including Tina Fey, Carrie Underwood, and Serena Williams. She has a weekly blog and radio show where she provides inspiring start tips and insider tricks to make fashion fun and approachable. She’s hanging out in Manhattan with her husband and her two kids in the Lower East Side of Manhattan when she’s not working. Let’s tune back into her wisdom and see how the clothes can align so that you are authentic. Well, I am so excited to have you back on the show. Welcome, Elysha.

Elysha Lenkin [2:45]
Thank you. I’m so excited to be back here with you, Christine.

Christine Schlonski [2:48]
I know. I loved our first interview, and you know you’ve done such an incredible work over the past 20 years, working for the magazines and transitioning into freelance and now having your own entrepreneurial journey. As I mentioned in the last episode, you work with some really, really big names, like Carrie Underwood and Serena Williams and for me, these are definitely two super, super confident women. Maybe you can give us, as a regular entrepreneur, not having a huge celebrity status, how does it feel working with them? How do they align with their clothes? Do they have a secret? How does it work?

Elysha Lenkin [3:37]
Well, I believe that confidence is the key. So yes, I’ve worked with some pretty big names in my career. And I find when they are engaged with their presentation, meaning they care about how they show up and what they were. So they would get involved with the clothing choices, this would be a way better experience for me. And it became more of a collaboration. Whereas sometimes they wouldn’t care as much. And they would have PR people or their managers taking over their wardrobe component. And then what happens is, these PR people and the managers are telling me to get certain clothes that weren’t aligned with the celebrities. And then what happens is that the celebrity comes, they look at the rack of clothes that I have gotten for them, and they don’t like any of it, it doesn’t want anywhere and we have it and that’s when it becomes a bit of a disaster. And it gets very stressful for everyone, they start to feel insecure, because I believe a lot of women have insecurities about their bodies, including celebrities. So if you’re faced with a rack of clothes that you’re not connecting to. That don’t seem like an authentic representation of who you are, that is not going to make you feel confident when you have to go in front of the camera.

Christine Schlonski [4:53]
Oh, yeah, I totally can see that. What would you, let’s say, so many entrepreneurs, they have their personal brand. They represent something, either they represent photography or painting or fashion like you do, or they are coaches or consultants. We all represent something. How important do you think is authenticity to their success?

Elysha Lenkin [5:19]
Well, authenticity is everything to their success. So you want your confidence to be built on a solid foundation. You want it to be a representation of who you truly are, you can align your clothes to help you represent in this way. So if you are doing personal branding, shoot, then pay attention to the clothes that you’re going to wear, think hard about how you want to be received by your customers. And the beauty about being an entrepreneur is that you’re in charge, you don’t have to have all these other people, all these entourages whispering in your ear about what you should wear. It’s nice to have one person, like a personal stylist, helping you, guiding you towards the best choices. But ultimately, you’re in charge. You want your clothing to be an accurate and authentic representation of who you are.

Christine Schlonski [6:14]
Yeah, I love that. I love that you are in charge piece. I totally agree. Like, no matter what you do, it’s always good to have some sort of a mentor or coach, because they see potential that you don’t see.

Elysha Lenkin [6:29]
Yeah, also they have the experience. When you’re hiring a mentor or coach or stylist, they have all their years of experience behind them, which means they worked with a lot of other people. Then you combine all that experience and then you customize that into your experience. If you’re the entrepreneur, then you’re getting all that experience customized so that you can show up in the best possible way.

Christine Schlonski [6:53]
Yeah, I totally agree. I gave my mom, a couple of years back I gave her like, an afternoon, where we had a stylist and we went shopping in one of the biggest and well known. Well, how do you say in English, like it’s not really a mall in Berlin. It was amazing. Somebody picking the clothes for you. Like, the right colors and fits like I would have never picked up. But once you tried them on, it was just a difference that you could not have seen yourself.

Elysha Lenkin [7:29]
And that’s exactly it. Yeah, that’s exactly it. That is probably one of the most common expressions that I hear from my clients is, “Oh, I never would have thought of that.”

Christine Schlonski [7:39]
Yeah.

Elysha Lenkin [7:39]
So it’s always interesting when you meet someone. Putting outfits together comes very easy to me. When you meet someone, when it’s effortless for them, then you’re going to learn from them. So getting an education is also part of it. You probably when you were with your mom, you were paying attention to what she was picking out for you. And then you took that information for the next time.

Christine Schlonski [8:02]
Yeah, well, we actually had a stylist for the whole afternoon, going through all the different departments with us and choosing clothes for us. And then we tried them on, I was like, “I would have never picked that up for you. But now it looks amazing.” So that was a really fun experience. As you said, it gave confidence and you discovered clothes that you would have never picked. It gives you more choices. For me, life is about choices. It’s fine if I just have maybe some people, they only wear black shirts, and then they’re done. But I think for us as women, as entrepreneurs, we also want to have a little bit of playfulness in our business.

Elysha Lenkin [8:51]
And getting involved with your style is an amazing way to bring some playfulness into your business. You can wear colors, you can wear prints, you can play around with different fashion details, like ruffles or zippers. That is definitely fun for me.

Christine Schlonski [9:07]
Yeah, and I totally can see how it helps your business also to accelerate because usually in our businesses, we are the leaders for the field we are in. People do look up to us at a certain extent to see like, “How can I be like she is? What can I do to have what she has? Be in that energy or have that energy.” So I think it’s so wonderful to allow yourself also to play with options. And to just have fun and not be like serious all the time, which gets pretty boring, and it’s probably going to wear you out over time.

Elysha Lenkin [9:49]
Well, I think that’s exactly it. Because when you can tap into the playfulness, the fun, and even the creativity, that is an instant way to shift your energy and your raise your vibration really so that you’ve tapped into fun, you become a little bit more light this is going to carry through with you and the rest of your day.

Christine Schlonski [10:10]
Yes. Oh, that’s beautiful. And by the way, I just, after our first episode, I thought about the conversation. And I remember and I still do that, but it’s more like an unconscious thing. So I have certain pieces of jewelry. When I knew back in the corporate world that I had a big negotiation, I would pick up that certain piece of jewelry, that was like my lucky charm or whatever. I would just wear it and I would know that that was in that piece, I closed X amount of dollars. It just gave me that confidence. Maybe at that moment or in the morning when I thought about it. Sometimes, when negotiation got rough, just touching that piece of jewelry, like having being reassured that you know what you do. And you just need to find the win-win and then the deal is going to be done. I think that can be a T-shirt or maybe not a T-shirt, it can be a blouse or a wonderful dress you feel amazing in hat shifts your whole energy and states.

Elysha Lenkin [11:22]
I couldn’t agree with you more. I am so behind what you’re saying right now. I’ve actually, I call it your lucky signature. Anybody can have one of these. That piece of jewelry, that piece of jewelry initially was neutral, but you chose to imbue it with that energy of winning. Win-Win is what you said, okay. Anybody can take anything they want. It could be a blouse, it could be a piece of jewelry, it could be a hat, it could be a pair of socks, a pair of shoes, a handbag, whatever you want, you choose, and then you just imbue it with that intention of winning. When you put that piece on, you are now the winner. I love that, I love that idea. I use it too, I have a pair of earrings and their star-shaped earrings. I got them from the store and they caught my eyes. Usually, your lucky signature will catch your eyes somewhere. Maybe, you’re on vacation, and you just have to have this piece and then you make it your lucky signature.

Christine Schlonski [12:23]
Yeah, not too long ago, I wanted to have a ring. I got the ring and then I realized, “Oh, I didn’t get the matching earrings.” They were actually done for me, which is like amazing. I can just see like, it makes me so happy because I love beautiful things. Just wearing the ring, nobody might notice and I don’t really care. But I know, it’s a beauty to me. So just having that, just puts me in a different state and probably more confident and also just feeling happier, maybe, or just knowing that I could make that possible for myself is such a nice feeling. I think that energy, that elevated energy feeds into your whole day.

Elysha Lenkin [13:22]
Exactly.

Christine Schlonski [13:23]
Surround yourself with things that you love and that you truly love. You don’t put it on because it’s a certain brand. Some people, they have to have a certain brand to feel amazing. But there for me, there are so many things that I find amazingly beautiful, that when I put them into my space, my energy shifts already.

Elysha Lenkin [13:50]
Yeah, and I love what you said about how other people may not even see it. So this goes back to that idea of what you were for your live streams or your zoom calls when people are only seeing your top half. I believe that you can still be intentional with your entire outfit. And the reason I believe this is really helpful is that it does shift your energy and it allows you to show up with more confidence because you know, it’s there and you love this piece. This piece makes you feel a certain way and it gives you more confidence. But I love the idea of surrounding ourselves with pieces that remind us of this.

Christine Schlonski [14:29]
Yeah, yeah. I so love beautiful things. I don’t really care if they have a brand or not. If my control system says beautiful, I’m totally happy and my status already elevated. So let me ask you, what was the very first thing you ever sold in your life?

Elysha Lenkin [14:48]
Okay, well, the very first thing that I sold in my life was a $20 style guide. I sold it online. Yup, I put it together and some people bought it. That just opened up a whole new world to me, it was like, “Wow! I can sell things online and people will buy it. This is fantastic.”

Christine Schlonski [15:15]
It totally is. I mean that the online world is so amazing. So there was nothing before like, no chocolate cookies, or baseball cards and stuff. When you can think back, like the very first thing you ever sold, not just in your business, like ever in your whole life.

Elysha Lenkin [15:34]
Okay, so going back. I mean, there was lemonade. So I sold lemonade. You know what’s interesting, and I spoke about this on our last session together is that sales did not come naturally to me. Sales were something that I had to learn. I wasn’t interested in selling things. The lemonade was probably my brother, my brother probably directed that whole thing. And I was the one carrying all the stuff in the back. So sales didn’t come naturally for me. So when I was younger, I wasn’t inclined to do it, I had to learn about sales, and I had to release my blocks around selling before I was ready to make that $20 style guide.

Christine Schlonski [16:21]
Yeah, but what I mean, what a nice story, right? I mean, just seeing how you evolved by shifting your mindset. And we talked about it in the last episode by shifting into service, which every heart-centered entrepreneur they want to serve, that’s what they’re all about. They want to make the world a better place. Even that sounds kind of corny, it’s still, that’s the belief, with their action, they can do something good. Then the sales piece often doesn’t feel aligned to it, it feels like they are taking, which is not really true. It isn’t energy exchange, we talked so much about energy and aligning with your clothes and your intentions. And it’s the same around money. So I just assumed when you sold your first style guide that you felt amazing.

Elysha Lenkin [17:14]
Oh, it was amazing. I felt like, “Wow, I can do anything now.” Seriously, I really, because I had overcome this block that I had carried around with me for so long. The possibility just became so clear. But you know, I want to get back to one important thing when we were talking about using your clothes to help build your confidence. This is related to sales because you really need to believe in yourself and what you’re offering when you’re selling. And when you take time for yourself to get intentional about the clothing that you’re going to wear, to express the feeling, you are conveying self-worth, because you are telling yourself and the world that you are worth that time. Because I know as entrepreneurs, we’re so busy, we have so many things to do. And if you’re not really into clothes or style, you’re not going to put any effort into that. But if you do, and when you do put in that effort to thinking about how you want to feel in your clothes, you are telling yourself that you’re worth that time, you deserve that time, and then you’re conveying high value. So in return, you receive high value.

Christine Schlonski [18:29]
I love that. I love that. That’s so, so important. I 100% agree. I’m even at the point now if I go shopping and something is not a hailed ‘Yes’, it’s a no. Because I had so many pieces in my closet dying, the surprise takes on. That I was like, I’m not gonna make any assumptions. If it’s a maybe or, often as women, if I lose a couple pounds, I’m going to fit into this amazing piece. I might just buy it to motivate myself. Then it doesn’t happen in that time period. Maybe it’s a summer dress. Either you’ve given up or it’s already winter. I think it’s so important this alignment piece, and really just having pieces that you feel amazing. No matter what you pick, you feel awesome.

Elysha Lenkin [19:27]
Yeah, you don’t need to have a closet with 99 pieces in it. I actually think it’s easier to simplify. I live in Manhattan, so space is an issue in New York City. So I keep a very tight wardrobe, I clear out things pretty easily. I don’t have a lot of nostalgia. So it’s pretty easy for me to get rid of things. But life is easier. When you have less in your closet, it almost becomes a weight. To tell you the truth 80% those clothes you’re probably not even wearing. They say that we only wear 20% of our wardrobes. I encourage you and everybody to go through that other 80% and be really honest with yourself what’s just sitting there and taking up space. And if it is just taking up space, you don’t need it.

Christine Schlonski [20:15]
Yeah, yeah, totally agree. And you know what, that also does it. It’s so interesting because that’s how the cycle kind of closes to sales. I declutter my closet a while ago, and it made an impact on my sales. It was so interesting to see by just seeing what thank you and then putting it, giving it the way. I do have a hard time and just throwing it away. So because if it’s a beautiful piece, I want somebody else to have a smile on their face because it’s now in their closet. Just by decluttering and I think that’s true for every area of your life but especially for your wardrobe. Only having those pieces you love that you can go into your closet, and you already feel amazing. Because no matter what you pick, you know it fits. And it looks good.

Elysha Lenkin [21:11]
And it makes you feel confident.

Christine Schlonski [21:12]
Yes. I think that can have a huge, not that can, it has a huge impact on your business.

Elysha Lenkin [21:22]
Absolutely, because the clutter, it weighs you down whether you realize it or not. I think you might not even notice it until you clear it out. Because then there is a sense of lightness, it just makes me so happy when I have that feeling, when I’ve cleared out some clothes and all of a sudden there’s more space. You don’t have to fill up space right away. Just let it be, let it be spacious.

Christine Schlonski [21:45]
Yeah, yeah. Awesome. Awesome. What is maybe a piece of advice or something you, you can give us to close this wonderful second episode with you?

Elysha Lenkin [21:57]
Well, I really would love it, if your listeners would, would become a bit more experimental with what they were. So to really tap into their creative energy because I, I think this creative energy, when you can tap into this is really going to help you through the rest of your day, it’s going to help you feel more confident, it’s going to help you feel lighter, it’s going to help you bring a sense of ease to what you do. So if you could just get in front of your closet, give yourself 10 minutes, not even that much time, but go to that 80% that you’re not wearing, pick out something from the back and look at it and try to wear it tomorrow, see what you can put together. Think about, “I wonder what this would look like if I paired it with this”, and then pick something else and just try it. See how you feel. I think by starting your day, from this place of creativity, it’s really going to set you up well for the rest of your day. And hopefully for your week, you continue the practice and then you’re going to get more sales in the end.

Christine Schlonski [22:56]
Yeah, awesome. Well, thank you so much. I so enjoyed our conversation. I think it’s amazing advice. People really need to connect with you. I put everything in the show notes that they can follow you on social media. That they can read your blocks. I mean, you have been featured on so many amazing places. One that stood out for me is the Oprah Magazine, Working Mother Magazine, Verizon. So there are so many places where you inspire people. I hope we inspired many, many people today, sharing your knowledge and wisdom. I would love to hear from the listeners, what changed? What changed for them? How do they feel? Also, do they make more sales? Make sure when you see that on social media, this episode that you leave a comment, and just let us know. Thank you so much for spending your time with us and for sharing your amazing knowledge. And yeah, just for being light, and creative light in this world.

Elysha Lenkin [24:03]
Thank you so much, Christine, it’s been such a pleasure speaking with you.

Christine Schlonski [24:07]
Well, I really, really had fun in this episode as well with Elysha. It’s really true. I mean, she makes fashion fun and approachable. And yeah, I just would love for you as like an assignment, like a challenge. Go through your wardrobe and see what can you play with. What goes together? How can you express yourself, your personality in a very unique and beautiful way so that it supports your authentic self, and that it helps you to be more confident and to really feel true to your self. Make sure you hop on over to https://christineschlonski.com/podcast to get the transcripts, the show notes, the key points to this episode, but as well as the resources we are sharing over there. And if you have not yet subscribed to Heart Sells! Podcast, just do that as well. It’s one click away. If you leave a rating and review, invite your friends to the heart seller movement, that would be wonderful. I really would appreciate that because the more fun we have in life, the more confident we show up, the more we serve from the heart, the more it will make a difference in this beautiful world. Thank you so much for tuning in. Have a wonderful day and I’m saying bye for now.