Resources in this Episode

Christine Schlonski [0:02]
Hi Gorgeous. This is episode number 096, with the amazing Cindy Ertman.

Cindy Ertman [0:08]
Hi, this is Cindy Ertman, you are listening to Heart Sells! Podcast with Christine Schlonski. Enjoy!

Christine Schlonski [0:14]
I am so excited to have Cindy Ertman on the show today. So before we dive in, make sure you hop on over to https://christineschlonski.com/ and you find the podcast tab and sign up for the empowerment notes. These are my notes getting into your inbox once a week with empowering messages and also with all the updates on Heart Sells! Podcast. Today, I want to thank the listeners in LA, California and also the listeners from China, believe it or not, Heart Sells! Podcast is already listened to in over 30 countries all over the globe. I’m so happy and grateful that you are here. Let’s dive into this amazing episode with Cindy Ertmann. Cindy is the CEO and founder of, The Defining Difference, and the Mortgage Master Pro, success based coaching and training companies devoted to helping people master the power of intentional choice to create a defining difference in their own lives. After being acknowledged as one of the, Top 100 Most Influential Mortgage Executives In America, by Mortgage Executive Magazine for five years in a row and being named in the Top 100 Mortgage Loan Originators in the US by Mortgage Originator Magazine for more than a decade, Cindy has now dedicated her life, to empowering the growth of others. I’m so super excited to have her on Heart Sells! Podcast today, because we are going to go deep, how you can set these intentions, and also how you can basically be the defining difference. Well, Cindy, I am so excited to have you on HEart Sells! Podcast today. Welcome.

Cindy Ertman [2:24]
Thanks so much. It’s so good to be here with you, Christine. Thanks for having me.

Christine Schlonski [2:28]
Yeah, I’m so excited to because you have so much going on. I mean, your level of success is really amazing and wonderful to watch. We got to go deeper today of how you achieve these levels of success and, maybe some challenges. But yeah, you just had a documentary coming out a while ago called, The Evolution of Success. Sharing your story together with amazing names like, Jack Canfield, Joe Vitale, Natalie Ledwell, Sonia Ricotti, so all names that are very known in the industry for self-development. Can you let us know like, what made you do the movie, and share a little bit of success path that it took to get there?

Cindy Ertman [3:25]
Well, life’s funny, when we set our intention, and several years ago, I was at an Oprah Winfrey conference and I set my intention about using film and TV to get my message out to a larger audience. I had no idea how I was going to do that. Honestly, Christine, I didn’t even do anything physically to create that, I just set the intention for that to occur in my life, and for it to sort of be drawn to me if you will. Much to my surprise, a few weeks later, after I went to that conference actually got a call from the TV producer, and ultimately became a co-host of Wake Up TV, which just ran one season, but it was conscious TV for women and so that’s sort of set on this path. In 2009, I did a year-long training session with Jack Canfield, called Train the Trainer with 100 trainers from around the world. Now many years later, I’m in his Transformational Leadership Council TLC with amazing transformational leaders from around the world. Just it’s been about developing relationships for me. In developing relationships ultimately got led to Matthew Toman, who’s out of Dublin, actually, he’s our director for the movie, The Evolution of Success. The thing that I love about this film he did such a beautiful job producing it. It is really isn’t so much about people’s success as the evolutionary journey as to how they got there. Because we know that, it’s great to get this level of success but how many times do we get knocked down along the way that sometimes we think we really can’t get up? It’s about, what steps do we take? How do we respond to the events of our life when really horrible, tragic, difficult things happen in our life in our business? It’s really interviewing these transformational leaders on their journey. It’s a very inspirational story, did a beautiful job with the cinematography. I think people get a lot of value out of this movie, I think it can really help give people hope, and faith, but it’s possible to get out of their current challenge if they’re in one.

Christine Schlonski [5:30]
Yeah, and you’re all about helping others to be empowered and to grow. I see when I see you at your bio, and what you’ve done, so beautiful. I just love that because it comes so from the heart and you have been through a lot. So when people are listening right now, I just want them to know that wherever they are in their life, there is the opportunity to turn things around.

Cindy Ertman [6:02]
Yeah, with that question, and that’s the thing. I come from a very long background in the mortgage industry, in the finance industry and ran a major company for many years, hired hundreds of people, built a region for a National Mortgage Bank in California. It had a lot of trials and tribulations along the way. For me, personally, when 2007, when the sort of financial crisis hit here in America, it was a really big deal. We couldn’t make payroll, every day we would come to work and I just wanted to stay in bed and pull the covers over my head and the thing is, we had no idea how long that crisis would last. So and suddenly, you go from making this huge income, to making no money and you can’t pay your people and you have no idea if you’re going to be able to get to the other side of it. Everyone around me was losing homes and cars and filling bankruptcy and their lives just turned upside down. Thousands and thousands of people were getting laid off from their jobs at a moment’s notice. It was really a great financial tragedy for so many people. Sort of as my own evolutionary journey at that moment, of how do I get up and take a step every day. I speak to that in the movie, how do you get through and keep going, and when you’ve got a company to lead and inspire others and help other people feel safe, and yet prepare for the worst. It was my own journey of how am I going to show up for these people. How do I create enough strength and myself to continue to lead a group of people that don’t know if they’re going to have jobs and economic security tomorrow. It’s a very scary place to be.

Christine Schlonski [7:48]
Yeah, yeah, definitely is, but what I just love, what you said is that you were concerned about the others first, so you put the others first, which helped you also to show up and to get through that. Whatever you want to call it hole or thing. There’s a saying like, “When walking through hell, keep walking.”

Cindy Ertman [8:11]
Right, exactly.

Christine Schlonski [8:14]
You did a great job doing that and supporting others on the way and I think that’s so amazing. Because you could have just given up, that would have also been an option.

Cindy Ertman [8:26]
Believe me, we thought about it. You really do think about it, because you have to weigh all the options. Sometimes you stay in it too long so it’s really, but you know, I think one of the things that was really beautiful between my partner and I is, in building our company over the years, we really created a family, and so it was it was, we were always about building, we were in it together. I think we really did run a heart-centered business. I think when you go through tragedy, and you go through it, and you feel like family, you help each other get to the other side. There are still many, many people here today that didn’t get paid some of them for months and yet they’re still here today. So it’s a very big tribute to them as well.

Christine Schlonski [9:14]
Yeah, I love that. I think that’s when you really in it for the long run, when you really want to make the world a better place. That is when people stick with you and with your message and support you because they see to what they can contribute and it does make a difference, right? I know so many people, well, not really any more present, but I knew a lot of people that hated their jobs. And then

Cindy Ertman [9:45]
A lot of people do and it’s sad because even, I’m now a coach and a trainer and I launched my coaching company five years ago. I think one of the things that so many people say to me in the first call is they just don’t know if I want to do this anymore. There’s so many people that need to make your paycheck or need to make a living, but they’re just not fulfilled in their life by the work that they do. I know, it’s really easy to say, “Lean into your passion.” But a lot of people don’t know how to do that. A lot of people don’t even know what their passion is. What I’ve learned for me, and it was a big, big catalyst for me, five years ago, I was running a branch with 65 people and a region with 20 branches and had the top producing sales team and in the branch, and it was great and raising three children and all that. I could have done it forever and made a lot of money but I had been in my life, in a place where I’ve been very, very passionate about my business. I would go home at night, and I could do the job really well and I love leading people. But I realized one day that I didn’t feel that spark anymore. I had to really ask myself, “Am I going to continue to do this for the money?”, and I did for a while. But I realized, when I’m working with my coaching clientele, I always start with the end in mind, I like to take them to their 90-year-old self and have them look back on their life, give perspective to go. We got to make every day count because they’re limited. I just made a decision that I wanted to show up and playful out of my own life. SoI made a very, very scary and tough decision. But I just this little voice in my head and I really encourage people to listen to that little intuitive voice in their head, because it’s such a powerful voice that our intellect drowns out, 90% of the time, but I’ve learned to trust that voice. That voice said to me, “It’s time because if not now, when?”, question mark. I would envision me being at the end of my life, laying in that hospital bed and not making the choice to act on my passion, which I trademark the name, The Defining Difference, in 2004. 10 years I knew I wanted to develop my coaching and training company. I’ve been a coach and a teacher and a trainer for 17 years within my organization and nationally, but I never under my own brand. I just decided that if not now when. I wrote a blog called, The Hallway of Uncertainty, and I leaped into uncertainty in a very big way. On the other side of that uncertainty, I live my passion again. So it’s a pretty magnificent thing when we can leap into that fear and the unknown and trust that and have faith that we will find the path even though we may not see the steps in front of us.

Christine Schlonski [12:36]
Yeah, yeah. And I think that’s why so many people get stuck because they think they have to have this master plan that leads them from A to B to C and then D is a big success or whatever they’re dreaming off. Life doesn’t work this way. That’s what I found, like starting to follow my heart and listening to that little voice made all the difference but I didn’t know how, I didn’t know when, I didn’t know where it’s one step at a time.

Cindy Ertman [13:07]
Well, it is and I’m a recovering perfectionist for sure. I remember many years ago, I was developing my website for, The Defining Difference. I was starting to map out my plan, but I just kept, it wasn’t done. I was in development for a very long time, trying to have it all mapped out, know what the next steps were. I was at a training, I’ve never forgotten that. She grew up. She had a big sticky on the wall, and she drew a stick figure. She showed the stick figure and then she showed a line that went over to this x, which was the thing I was trying to create, meaning my new business. She said, “Cindy, you’re in development, development, development, development”, and then she drew a straight line and she said, “Just do it. It doesn’t have to be perfect. It doesn’t have to be done if your site’s not done, but coming soon”, and that visual helped me make the decision to just launch even though it wasn’t 100% ready, even though I wasn’t sure exactly what the clear path was, even though I wasn’t sure what the next step was. That was some of the best advice I was ever given and I acted on it.

Christine Schlonski [14:15]
Yeah, that’s the important portion, right? You get this amazing advice, but then you need to take action.

Cindy Ertman [14:22]
Right. Exactly.

Christine Schlonski [14:25]
So what can somebody do if they are not an action taker, do I guess that right? Are you a natural action taker or is that something you had to learn?

Cindy Ertman [14:34]
Oh, I definitely trained myself. I was not this overachiever as a kid at all. Because as a child, sometimes I look back and I don’t even know where it came from as an adult because it was not who I was growing up. I was an average student, I didn’t excel in school, I was okay. I was a responsible student, but I was average. When I went to college, I remember my father saying, “You know, don’t forget you learn as much from your social experiences as you do from your academic one.” So I took that to heart and I had a lot of social experiences. I was never this overachiever. I really, I graduated with a communications degree from college and felt semi-qualified to do everything and not qualified to do anything. And I had really no idea how my path would unfold. Started in real estate and ultimately, switched to the mortgage industry, and then started doing a lot of leadership training and teaching and working with in the last few years, high level executives and high performance executives and leaders, and that’s sort of become my passion, because I find so many high-level executive leaders, they make money, but they’re not necessarily fulfilled in their life. And so it’s a matter of sort of redefining success and helping people kind of rewrite their stories, and they find that that passion again, but regarding action, I think the thing is, people sometimes don’t know what action to take, right? So you’ve got to have a plan and that’s what I help people do is to create a plan, because I think some people don’t know what to do. I always suggest that people focus on an hour time block a day of, and do five income generating activities, or five relationship generating activities each and every day. So that, if the world is coming at you, and you just have no time, which is what people are always in overwhelm, and there’s just too much on their plate, and they’re not sure what steps to take as let’s define what is an income generating activity for you and condense it to one hour and you really commit to do that before the hour of noon. So that you’re really working every single day towards building and growing and expanding your business in a meaningful way. It can be baby steps, but taking those steps, because when you go home, at the end of the day, there’s a much greater level of fulfillment when you know you’ve taken real actual steps each and every day, to build and grow and expand your business and maybe just create, expand your influence in your marketplace. If you’re trying to reach more people, what could those steps be. Then some people need accountability, which is where a coach comes in, or a mentor comes in, or an accountability partner that’s a friend or a business associate, to help keep you on track to check in and I think people need that. Sometimes they need the push, the kick.

Christine Schlonski [17:25]
Yeah, I totally agree. For myself, I found that working with coaches and mentors, is some kind of a shortcut, it could take me like decades to find it out and they might have the example you just mentioned, the stick figure with the x, you have a version of that, keeps you moving forward. Also having accountability partners, I find very helpful, because you do not want to show up in the next meeting, not having done anything.

Cindy Ertman [17:58]
The thing is, it’s not and it doesn’t feel good, either. People know when they’re not taking steps. We are our own worst enemies, right? The negative self chatter that we give ourself all day long, and we’re not taking action. I have a team around me now and my team manages my calendar, I’ve learned to give up a lot of things so that my day is managed much more effectively and they do a much better job of managing my calendar than I do. So my day is very full and very productive and very structured and I have a team that that helps keep me accountable. I use them as a filter because I get asked to do so many speaking engagements and interviews and all these wonderful things come but I can’t do everything so I use them as a filter too, to make sure that what I’m saying yes to is aligned with my own value system. That’s really important to me, too.

Christine Schlonski [18:53]
Yeah, I totally get that. So if somebody is listening out things like, “Well, great income generating activities. Ha! Well, would that be restructuring my homepage, like or changing the About Me page?” Do you have some some advice where they could start looking besides making a sale, which seems to be pretty obvious, but what are the activities that help towards that goal to have a bigger impact and a better business?

Cindy Ertman [19:27]
Well, it’s a really good question, because people do ask me when I’m training around, focus on five income generating activities each day, or I will say relational activities, because sometimes about who we need to meet. I mean, obviously, if you’re in sales, it’s about touching more customers and reaching more people, obviously, and creating a stronger value proposition so that they want to say yes to what it is that you’re selling. I think it’s all the above, I think working on websites is great. I think sometimes I don’t see websites sometimes as an income generating activity, even though we know we need to have a presence. I know for me, I’m in the middle of revamping my whole website right now, because it’s too much, it’s too busy. Then today’s world, you want your site to load within about three seconds. So Google doesn’t really recognize it. So there are things that we need to do too. But I think sometimes we make it too complicated, the best thing we can do is just be simple. Start with something very, very, very simple and don’t overthink it. Because as we know, websites are this constant evolution. So having a simple presence certainly is better than no presence. But I think, you know, one of the things I do in coaching as I help people really discover their why and greatest strength. So I always say, start with, “What is your three greatest strengths?”, in the context of the people you serve. Some people will say, “Well, I’m a great communicator”, it’s like, “Okay, well, that’s awesome, but how does that benefit the people that you serve?”, and so I just asking yourself, the question of what are your three greatest strengths and what are the three greatest strengths of your company or who it is that you serve, or this the service you provide, or the product you provide or the company you work for, if you’re working for somebody else. What are the three greatest strengths of your company in the context of the people that you serve, and getting clarity on that helps you really discover what your real value is. I always say, if you want to make more money, you’ve got to create more value. Some of these people just aren’t even clear on the value that they currently have. I think getting really clear on the value that you provide, and how does that really serve them. Because, creating a stronger business is really about focusing on them, not on us. Websites need to be about your customers, they need to be about the pain points that you’re solving for your customer. What is it that your service provides that solves a problem and creates a solution for the people that you serve? I think from that perspective, or website is really impressed. But, you know, who are you trying to reach? I’m trying to expand and scale my business right now and one of the things is challenging about that is, how do you scale a business and yet maintain the level of value and connection that I have with my clients now? I’m struggling with that personally and trying to create some solutions where I don’t lose the intimate connection that I have with my, with my clients, because it’s such a big part of the success of my business. So for me, it’s about maybe reaching out to corporations, and so income generating activities for me, or who do I need to reach out to that can be a potential customer? Who would benefit from my value? Who needs to go on my list of contacts? So a lot of times, it’s about who do we need to reach out to. Who do we need to make that cold call to, if you will? Who do we need to know? Who do you know Christine, that you could introduce me to? Who do I know that I could help you with larger audience? So using your network, our networks are very powerful, and we very seldom tap in to the people right around us to say, “Who do you know? What two people do you know, Christine, that you could introduce me to that might benefit from my services, and vice versa?” Collaboration with other amazing people, we don’t do very often and yet, it’s a really powerful tool, how I ended up here, collaborating with other great leaders.

Christine Schlonski [23:26]
Awesome, yeah, it’s a very powerful tool. And I see that so often, especially like when people are starting out, or they’re still a solopreneur, or have like a one or two person team, that they’re so focused on their own little world and bubble, that it doesn’t even come to mind, that a strategic partnership, or doing a program with somebody together or whatever, could really help them to accelerate and to give more value to people that actually need it.

Cindy Ertman [23:59]
Thank you. I mentioned just briefly because it’s been impactful. In my own business, when I launched my coaching and training company, is the beauty with social media, the beauty with particularly Facebook is, there’s all these groups established, and you can join so many groups that are already established in the realm of what it is that you teach, train service provide. Being a coach in the mortgage and financial industry, and now to executive leaders, I put myself into groups, and then began to provide value drop in, comment, share other ideas. And pretty soon people start paying attention to you in that group and communicating with you. And I’ve developed some amazing relationships off of Facebook and in some of these specialized groups, and actually got a lot of clients from that interaction and that interaction is free. So when we’re starting out and building businesses, and don’t have a lot of capital and resources, it’s a great resource and getting a little more intentional about who we connect with, I always tell people pick your 20 best potential referral sources and friend, request them on Facebook and begin to interact, not just like them, but begin to interact. I’ve done that a lot. And then after a month or two, when I feel like I’d have a little bit of a connection that all pick up the phone because now it’s a warm call, it’s not a cold call. But it’s an easy way to begin to expand our influence in our fields of expertise.

Christine Schlonski [25:28]
Yeah, and it’s, it’s a beautiful way to really connect, to not be on the surface level, but to have the opportunity to go deeper, because then we can provide even more value. What I really love, I mean, reconnected that way, we had a conversation first to really get to know each other better. And I love that you bring so much value to the table. So even for our listeners, you have this wonderful gift that you usually charge for. We have the opportunity to get it for free, it’s, 7 Instant Skills. Let us know what is this about and where people can find it. And then yeah, time flies,

Cindy Ertman [26:11]
For you here, this is what you’ll actually receive. It’s actually a 22-page ebook that I created in the last couple of years. It’s, 7 Instant Skills to ignite your life, business and income because people were always asking me, “Well, how did you get to this level of success in your life? What does success mean to you?” So I started putting pen to paper about some of the practices that I’ve actually utilized and continue to utilize in my own life. And so it’s really just seven different steps, if you will, skills, like from my morning ritual. Do you have a morning ritual? But I’m such a big believer that what we put into our brain and into our head every day, it can either fuel us, it can inspire us or expire us, right? So we’ve got to be intentional if we want to really be begin to build and grow our business. So one is secrets to wake up your day and just some of the success things that I actually do. I do start my day with 15 minutes of meditation and I work with a lot of high-level leaders that are like, “I can’t meditate. I’ve got monkey brain”, and everybody can meditate but it’s like a practice, it’s a muscle. I start people out with two minute meditations and we grow from there and I do 15 minutes every single day. It definitely sets the tone of the grounding for my day. One of the skills is mastering your mindset, because mindset and attitude is everything from my perspective where it all begins. So giving people some really solid suggestions as to how to maybe shift that mindset around. What stories are you telling yourself that just aren’t true? Sometimes we need to reframe the stories in our head to take us to that next level. Because if we don’t believe we can be successful, how is anyone else going to believe it? We’ve got to adopt our own powerful mindset. The power of five, which is focusing on the five income generating activities each day, getting focused about how we manage our day and blocking out a little bit of time to build and grow our business each and every day, leveling up your relationships, getting very intentional about. Who you allow into your life? Who’s depleting you intentionally? Who do you maybe need to spend less time with? So sometimes it’s not always about piling more things on, sometimes it’s about letting go of certain things that are no longer serving us. So that we can focus on what matters most trusting your instinct and intuition and how to do that. Because that is a skill like anything else. So getting more intentional about really listening to that voice instead of second-guessing it and maybe trusting it and leaning into what it’s guiding you to do. Powerful ways to take care of you because we usually put ourselves last where building or growing a business. We don’t take care of ourselves. Without health, we have nothing. So I think really doing it intentional practices each and every day. And certainly, each and every week that really fuels us and fill us up so that we can serve more people and an effective way. And then just helping people really get intentional about making each day count to show up and playful out in your own life. And some ways to take responsibility and accountability. And at the end of the day, you’re being your own defining difference was it’s a choice. It’s a choice to make a new choice. I believe we all have the ability to rewrite our own story, even in a small way. But it’s about, if you’re not happy if you’re not fulfilled anymore in your life. I want to help people take steps and sometimes they’re baby steps. Then pretty soon there’s another baby step. Then all of a sudden, this new world unfolds before you in the glass ceiling breaks above your head, and you’re like, “Oh my gosh, this possibility and opportunities been there all along but I’ve been living small and in my little box and now it’s pretty cool. Because for me that ceilings gone and nothing stops me now. This year no longer holds me down because my vision is greater than my fear. So my year now takes a backseat and it’s a pretty cool place to be. But I wasn’t always that way.”

Christine Schlonski [30:14]
Yeah and I love to dive into all of this with our second interview because we’re having a second interview and there’s so many golden nuggets. So I’m happy that we’re not putting it all in one that people can actually really listen and take those baby steps to really digest all the wonderful things you just shared. Yeah, so I’ll definitely link that into the show notes. Obviously, all the links that lead to you so people can connect with you on social media, reach out, have the conversation. Thank you so so much, Cindy, for giving us this input today and the beautiful work you do in the world.

Cindy Ertman [30:58]
Well, thank you, Christine, for having me an absolute pleasure to be with you and your audience. And they can definitely get this download at http://7instantskills.com/ and I absolutely would love to do a second interview with you. Thank you so much for having me. You’re awesome.

Christine Schlonski [31:15]
What a wonderful and inspirational episode this Cindy Ertman, I just loved our conversation. And I love how you can find the defining difference. And also for me, how can you be the defining difference maybe in other people’s lives, and by setting intentions, you actually create your own magic. I have found that true for me. The more intentions I said the more I stay on that path to go for my dreams, to stop just dreaming and act now, the more amazing things are coming to me, the more I can create. And I think the example Cindy shared are just amazing. The way to go about it is pretty clear. I just want to make sure you hop on over to https://christineschlonski.com/ Find the podcast tab takes in this episode. And there you have the transcript, the show notes, the key points, and also all the links to connect with her on social, it’s just one click away. And what I really, really love is her wonderful free gift, which actually gives you the opportunity to dive in deeper. So that will be available for you in the resource tab. So hop on over to https://christineschlonski.com/ and find the podcast tab. And there’s everything you need to know. And again, thank you so much for listening. I am so happy and proud. We are going to approach Episode 100 next week, and I just want to thank you for being here, for the encouragement, for your ratings and review on iTunes and Stitcher as well for the emails that are reaching me. So without you, this podcast would basically not exist because then I will just be talking by myself with couple guests. That’s all exciting because we know we can serve you to really create a business and lifestyle you desire and for you to become that defining difference. Wishing you a wonderful day wherever you are in this beautiful world and bye for now.

Transcribed by https://otter.ai